Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
