Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
