Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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