It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize