Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
