All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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