Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
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