Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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