dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
