How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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