i can't believe i had my finger in that
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
