I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
