the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I currently don't understand fingers.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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