You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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