when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Randomize
