Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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