the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
