love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Randomize
