his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
