I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Swine flu is the new snow day.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
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