He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
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