people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
