I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize
