I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize