you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
