I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
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