This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
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Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
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I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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