did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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