I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Randomize
