Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
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Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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