He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
