i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize