she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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