Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Actions speak louder than pants.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
