Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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