He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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