Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
so that wasnt chicken after all
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
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Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
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