census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
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