worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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