So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize