Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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