I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
