I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
what day is it and did you see me today?
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize
