well I can't set my house on fire every night
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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