My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
