Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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