I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
the day after is always just damage control
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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