So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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