So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
