did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
They have beer where we have blood.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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