he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize